Thursday, December 18, 2008

I Just Blogged... To Say... I Love You.

Everyone, this is Jeff.

You may remember him from such posts as The Harper One, The Drinking One, The Other Drinking One, and The One About That Dude Going To Beijing For Some Olympic-y Thing

He's very special to me and Craig.

But lately, he feels unloved by us. And so, this post is to prove that to be untrue.

Remember all the good times, Jeff?


Remember when we 'drank til 6am' that 'one time'?

Remember watching Mitch Hedberg on YouTube for hours, and then repeating it all for weeks after? "Bag em up"? "I'm FOR 'em"?

Remember Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp?

Remember our day dates, when we'd go do stuff 'n junk and you'd show me places 'n stuff and we'd look at crap and things?

You can't forget that.

Without you, I wouldn't know as much of Gilbert Gottfried's goodness. Or the 20 million random jokes you've taught me. Or what it's like to almost throw someone's Blackberry in a hotel toilet accidentally on purpose while he's sleeping in the next room.

I also wouldn't have the two Klosterman books that I borrowed from you and have yet to return. ... oh, right. I um, still have your books.

Anyways.... you get what I'm saying.

The love has not wavered, my dear chimp.

Nay, it has only grown.

Even your bigshot hockey night in Canada-ness is not enough to scare THIS broad away.

Come back to us.


"K" (aka - Leggy leggy leggy leggy, blondie blondie blondie blondie)

p.s. - John Bland has been spreading his propaganda and lies. Don't believe it. And he owes me a banana.


Mike D. said...

I don't think he remembers, Kris. Another friend you've left behind cause you're all Torontonian now? Bad.

Kris said...


He's my friend FROM Toronto.

Dork. :)

Anonymous said...

Quite heartwarming. I hope it works out for you Kristen. And Hedberg is AWESOME, good call!

Kris said...

Thanks, Mr. or Mrs. Mysterio. :)

chimp said...


Look at you being all festive and sweet with me.

Craig just called and told me about your love for your boy down the street.

If largeness of a man was judged by the kindness of his friends then you've made me a giant.

As for Bland he's been spotted all over the hood driving around with Creto looking for Lance Link and Mata Hairi. He come knocking on your door yet? Thought I heard him mumbling something about tagging some 'daisy" lady.

You know anything about that?

Guess what we're doing tonight?

Hint: "so, what do you call your act?"

Kris said...

Uh-oh... The Aristocrats? Tonight?

I'd better stretch.

And you best tell that son-of-a-chimp Bland that he will be castrated if he comes within 30 feet of my Daisy.

She's a hussy, she doesn't know any better.

chimp said...

chimp said...

and in Spanish...yup!

Kris said...

Aw hell.

It's now in my head. Luckily not in Spanish... yet.

chimp said...

I leave a message on your phone

send you a text

claire is sorting out nine inch nails mp3's

shoveled the show

watched the juniors game

ate dinner

and now just waiting for you and craig... justify my love

Kris said...

I have no minutes on my phone :(

We went to bed early.

Ate dinner really late.

What ya doin' tomorrow?

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