Friday, November 18, 2011

Don't Get Any Big Ideas, They're Not Gonna Happen

Oh, I'm thinkin' it's time for Email o' The Week...:

Hi there Kris,

I thought I would drop you a line and give my two cents. I have been reading your blog for quite some time, and you come across as a young woman who is put together and intelligent. Please do forgive me if this is out of line, but you also seem to have a vulnerability that I can only assume is from having no steady boyfriend to speak of. Call me old fashioned, but I think every woman needs a man to take care of them. A lovely one like yourself should settle down with a good man who will take care of you so that you don't have to.

I left out the rest, but this is his main idea. I apparently need a man to take care of me because I'm just a female - I don't know how to. (This is where you're supposed to picture me twirling my hair and shrugging while batting my big dumb eyelashes).

This email actually reminds me of that blog post I did last year about the chick who told me to be more 'delicate'.

Meh.

Like... I'm totally just a girl! Am I, like, smiling enough?
Here's the thing - I assume this note wasn't meant to be insulting. But lemme smack ya upside the head with some truth.

I am single. I live alone. I run my own business.

I do most things on my own, I pay my own bills, run my own errands, and take care of my dog and apartment and everything else on my own.

It's called being self-sufficient. Independent. And it's not a bad thing. In fact, it's the opposite.

I do not, nor will I ever, need a man to take care of all those things for me. Had that been the case, I would have settled for a guy long ago, for that reason alone. I'm single by choice, and will continue to be until I find a dude that fits my life; a guy that I'll be nuts for. That's it.

My friend, you were correct when you said you may be old-fashioned. In 2011, women are strong personalities who take care of their own shit and are damn proud of it. Relationships are partnerships, not daycares.

Bottom line - this chick's doin' just fine. Thanks for the concern, but trust that my next serious boyfriend will be my equal and not my caretaker.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go get out my tool box and do some plumbing.


31 comments:

TJ said...

Do you really have a toolbox?

Kris said...

I really do!

TJ said...

Sexy.

Kris said...

My mom has her own power tools. My parents made sure I had a tool box when I moved here. They teach their daughters well!

Masuka said...

I think I have my next Masuka vlog question... "Hey Kris.. what ELSE do you do alone?"

Alyson said...

"Relationships are partnerships, not daycares."

Hells yeah!

Hair On Whale said...

It sounds like an attempt to woo you. Yoohoo, woohoo!

Bill said...

WOW!!! How does anyone even think like that, never mind email it to you?

Vy Braytor said...

My batteries need to be replaced and please don't hide me in the drawer again.

Vy Braytor said...

My batteries need to be replaced and please don't hide me in the drawer again.

E Rabbit said...

I'll bring some

Vernon said...

Baha! I bet he lives with his mom!

Kris said...

Oy vey.

screetus said...

I need a trio of cloned Burmese midgets to take care of me. And a talking leopard.
Can your company provide this?
Kthxbye.

Wil said...

Easy there now little filly, no need to get your apron strings all ruffled. Now go and make me a pot pie!

Kris said...

screetus - Yes. Yes we can!

Wil - I wish I knew HOW to make a pot pie!

Mike D. said...

Any man would be a fool to not want to take care of you, but the wonderful thing is that you wouldn't need him to. Isn't that the way it should be?

Kris said...

You get what I'm throwin' out there, D.

Uncle Farty Pants said...

Glad i could help by writing that post for ya Special K.

You just let me know when you need me to take care of things again ok? Poor little lamb-chop.

PatZ said...

so you were emailed by the ghost of Ronald Reagan?

Kris said...

UFP - Cook me a lamb chop?

Pat - Only on Tuesdays, yes.

Nick said...

(sorry if this is a dupe, login weirdness)

I don't think anyone can be TRULY independent. Goes for men and women.

There's always going to be something you can't do, or can't do well, and I don't think it's embarrassing to have help in those cases.

That said, the point to finding a mate isn't to replace yourself, but to find someone who compliments you. Someone who can fill in for your shortcomings and support you where you need it (physically, mentally, spiritually, etc), just like you can fill in their shortcomings and support them.

I hope I'm not out of line saying that - the dude is wrong in what he said, but the idea of having someone there to take care of you (when you need it) isn't entirely.

I know I like being taken care of, sometimes. :)

Kris said...

You're completely right. I agree - I just don't like the idea that some people think women can't get by on their own, or take care of themselves well enough. I can't do everything alone, no. I have family and friends and handy-dandy buddies who help me if I need it. But on a day-to-day basis, I do ok by myself. :)

Nick said...

No doubt! May you find who you're not looking for, though. ;)

Kris said...

Hahaha, thanks buddy ;)

Dill Dough said...

We can take care of each other. I may have a hard head but at least I'm flexible

Thunderpuss said...

You're telling me!

Greasy Pygmalion said...

Fill 'er up!

Dr. Ruthie Westhammertime said...

zo ven vas zee last time you had zee boom boom?

Ziggy Froyd said...

zat ees a gut qvestion

Kris said...

Oh, hi again.

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