Tuesday, November 1, 2011

The Wall Was Too High, As You Can See

A lot of non-business-related emails come my way daily. Sometimes they're sweet & flattering. Sometimes they're friendly & nice.

Sometimes they're a bit... strange.

These ones often cause me to assume that someone's having a bit of fun with me; playing a silly joke in hopes that I'll take the creepy bait (oh, that Kris... what a gullible little girl).

That was my first reaction to this one:

Hello Kristen,

I came across your profile on Google+ and when I saw your photo, I was like WOW!! This woman is gorgeous!! You are very beautiful and look very sweet and caring! Know I have been looking all over for you! You truelly are a real dream girl come to life for me! I hope you don't mind me emailing you as your email was made visible to me as I put you in my circle of friends on Google+! Don't fret, I am not looking to hook up with you right away or anything like that! I simply felt it was important of me to let you know how I feel about you! It is totally up to you if you wish to reply back to me, but I sure would like to have you in my life as a friend or more if you are interested of course! Your a lucky girl considering I like you and all! lol. ;-)

Sincerely,
your new friend,
(I'm not adding his name, obviously)



Huh?

I rarely go on Google+ - there's hardly any info about me on there. So I assumed this was just someone being funny. I get random emails like this every once in awhile and tend to ignore them; the internet is a strange place, after all. For some reason, I didn't ignore this one. Instead, I checked out the dude's profile and creeped his social media links to see if he was real. I even emailed him back and asked if he was.

Turns out, it's legit. He's a (somewhat) normal guy.

And so, I have to ask... do these kinds of emails ever work for anyone? Really?

Because while I now realize he meant well, was trying to be nice and didn't intend to creep the shit outta me... I don't see how it could have any other outcome. Some of those comments are way overboard.

So to those who may reply and tell me that I'm a bitch for not wanting to scoop this dude up, this is my reaction to you:


animation maker


Your thoughts, friend-type-people?

48 comments:

ns said...

Probably "Hey, I think you're cute, and we should hang out some time." would've driven the point home more effectively and unweirdly.

Alyson said...

IMO anyone contacting you purely on the basis of your looks isn't anyone worth your time.

Kris said...

Exactly! See, you get it.

Kris said...

Alyson - Nope, agreed. And since he had no other info to base any of it on... it just makes no sense.

Sir Fixxx said...

Takes a lot of balls for that guy to say that...

Unfortunately when you sit behind a computer write what he said, that saying goes right out the window.

With that said. Lets be facebook friends.

Kris said...

Hahaha... I'm not at all surprised by your comment.

And no, it takes no balls to say that stuff at all! And if he had said it in person? Still creepy: "Hi we've never met but I've waited all my life for you, dream girl. But hey, we don't have to have sex just yet."


...eek.

ghetto.punk.chic said...

My opinion? Too many exclamation points. That's just damn freaky....and not in a good way.

Kris said...

Good point. (Ha - point!)

Also the spelling and grammar. Even without the creepy factor, it just wouldn't have worked out ;)

Bill said...

I say leave him alone based on improper use of the word YOUR

Kris said...

I'm with ya on that one.

Anonymous said...

He just wants to hit it.

Kris said...

I'm assuming his tactics rarely work for him.

RealSuperKeith said...

Ah, the Creep-Meister B's...*shakes head* - when will they learn?

Jenn A. said...

I find google+ in general to attract a lot of weird people. I mean I haven't signed on there in ages and I keep getting emails saying these weird randoms added me.

I don't know what was up with that guy, how could he think that this may work? Why would he think that you might be interested in him after such a creepy message? What planet does he live on?

DANK said...

I simply felt it was important of me to let you know

Kris said...

SuperKeith - They never do, instead they just keep comin' my way.

Jenn - Agreed, that's why I dont like Google +. 90% of the people who add me are people I've never heard of.

Wil said...

"Don't fret, I am not looking to hook up with you right away or anything like that!" - Hey, he's trying to take it slow here, quit your bellyachin'!

So going out on a limb here I guess my twice weekly emails asking for pics of your armpits aren't really swaying you any? I'll back it down to say bi-weekly.

Kris said...

Dank - Psh. Had it been you, I would have received a clever email. CLEVER.

Wil - Bi-weekly works for me. The armpits feel pressure some days.

screetus said...

Perhaps this individual has confused Google+ with Lavalife.

Also, be sure you've switched off the "make my middle name Dream Girl" default feature in the Google+ settings.

Kris said...

Ah, shit! Did I overlook that one?

Ugh. Yet again, you are my hero.

justinbaisden.com said...

Emails to send out feelers for friendships or more are gutless. If you want/need to go that route there's dating sites.

What's a Google+?

Kris said...

My thoughts exactly ;)

PatZ said...

So, is he taking advice on how to write greetings from those Nigerian Prince emails? cause yeah, that's what I got out of that.

Kris said...

Hahahahaha... oh, I need to go look in my junk mail and compare.

Masuka said...

Since my idea of pretending to be the person who sent super creepy email has already been taken, I'll post a more serious comment:

I think a lot of people take liberties with how they interact with you because of how much of yourself you put online. People can get a sense of who you are from reading this blog and then send you an email like they're your best friend. While I think what you put down here is authentic Kristen, it's also only one side of who you are.

More to the point, I think people in general are just plain fucking idiots. Somewhere along the line, human decency went out the window and it was replaced by a generation of dipshits that can't communicate without the use of some sort of QWERTY keyboard.

I hate people. (but love boobs) that is all.

Kris said...

I agree 100% with that comment, my dear.

However... this dude hasn't even been to my blog. That email was sent right after he saw my almost non-existent Google + profile... so that makes it a bit stranger.

I love this line ya wrote, though: "Somewhere along the line, human decency went out the window and it was replaced by a generation of dipshits that can't communicate without the use of some sort of QWERTY keyboard."

'Suka speaks the truth.

TJ said...

huh, huh...

Come to Butthead.

Kris said...

:)

Actually, Butthead came to me.

Mike D. said...

You're like a creeper factory.

Kris said...

Ugh. True. And so very sad.

Anonymous said...

so... did it work?

Kris said...

Yes. Our wedding is tomorrow. In lieu of actual gifts, we'll accept money, high fives, and prayers for the well-being of my poor, ruined soul.

Anonymous said...

LOL!

ns said...

I disagree with Alyson - Nothing wrong with contacting someone based on their looks. What do you think people do in bars or the park or whatever?

Let's be honest here - looks, like anything, are a selling point, if just one of them. You've got plenty of time after that to learn about each other and create a deeper connection if you desire.

Looking down on someone who thinks you're attractive is kind of doing yourself a disservice, you know?

Kris said...

True... looks are usually the first thing attracts a person. But there are still certain ways to go about approaching a total stranger without coming off creepy or even shallow.

Keir said...

Just added you. Oh yeah, I be creepin.

I'm_an_idiot said...

I think it's a percentage based attack. He probably spams every girl he comes across online with a similar email. 99% reject him, but there's always that 1% that might take the bait.

You could be the 1%! He just wants to occupy... your pants. (How's that for creepy?!)

Andrew II said...

^We have a winner.

I think it's more along the lines of Jim Carrey, "So you're telling me theres a chance!"

Danger Owl said...

At least he came out and did it, instead of just hovering about with drool in the corner of his yap like a few others might, and do...

Kris said...

...said the creep-o owl.

Anonymous said...

I'm truly enjoying the design and layout of your site. It's a very easy
on the eyes which makes it much more enjoyable
for me to come here and visit more often. Did you hire out a designer
to create your theme? Fantastic work!

My website :: web site for dating

Anonymous said...

Hello There. I found your blog using msn. This is a
really well written article. I�ll be sure to bookmark it and come back to
read more of your useful info. Thanks for the post.

I will definitely return.

Look at my webpage: dating women sites

Anonymous said...

I think this is one of the most vital information for me.
And i'm glad reading your article. But want to remark on some general things, The site style is perfect, the articles is really excellent : D. Good job, cheers

my blog free online adults dating

Anonymous said...



my webpage juicemissions.org

Anonymous said...

certainly like your web-site but you have to check the spelling on several of your posts.
Many of them are rife with spelling issues and I
find it very bothersome to tell the truth nevertheless I will definitely come back again.



Here is my site adult finder

Anonymous said...

Thanks for ones marvelous posting! I certainly enjoyed reading it,
you will be a great author.I will always bookmark your blog and will eventually come back at some point.
I want to encourage you continue your great job, have a nice morning!



my homepage - casual encounters

Anonymous said...

Hey very nice site!! Man .. Beautiful .. Amazing .. I'll bookmark your website and take the feeds also�I'm happy to
find numerous useful info here in the post, we need work out
more techniques in this regard, thanks for sharing.
. . . . .

Check out my page - internationaal datingsite

Anonymous said...

Hi, i think that i saw you visited my web site thus i
came to �return the favor�.I am trying to find things to improve my website!
I suppose its ok to use a few of your ideas!!



Review my weblog :: fuckbook

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...