I've gone back to old drafts of posts that I never bothered finishing - here's one of 'em:
When it comes to dating, I think most normally-functioning people have one or more deal-breakers. These are the things that we simply will not allow, or traits that are must-haves in our potential significant others. So I took to Twitter and Facebook, and asked what your deal-breakers are to see how they compared to my own.
As usual, you guys came through with awesome responses. These are a few of yours.
- Fashion sense (no Christmas sweaters after January, so I'm told. Darn.)
- Sense of humour
- Love for animals (mainly dogs were mentioned, but this was the most popular answer.)
- Sense of self (I am Kristen. I sense this.)
- A pulse (is this absolutely necessary?)
The Traits You'd Better Trash:
- Narcissism (does this deal-breaker list make me look fat?)
- Control issues
- Ditziness (like, oh my god!)
...and probably my favourite (glad two people brought it up) - treating waitstaff poorly. It says a lot about ya.
I have to admit, I've had a few deal-breakers throughout the years that ended up being, well... broken. Sometimes they just aren't as important as originally thought, especially when you end up dating people you never saw coming. That's usually the case with me.
As it stands now, at 31, my priorities have slightly shifted from those of my twenties and I guess my deal-breakers reflect that. All "growns up" with new priorities, and less bullshit I'm willing to put up with. So here are a few of my own:
- My dog has to like the guy. But since she's never met a person she wasn't batshit crazy about (Daisy is an equal-opportunity people lover), it might be more important that he love Daisy - I couldn't ever date someone who disliked my dog. Best-case scenario is when someone loves my dog nearly as much as I do.
- Must love music. Yeah yeah, everyone loves music. But my ideal dude loves music the way I do, hopefully even likes the same styles I do but can introduce me to new bands, and will be stoked to go to shows with me.
- Honesty, follow-through, and accepting me as I am. I lump all of these into one, because put together they represent something pretty important. They're all linked. In my opinion, there's nothing worse than someone pretending to be something they're not, constantly breaking promises, and/or pretending to like your quirks, until you're too far into the relationship and it becomes a big ol' problem. My motto is: less problems, more pizza.
- To steal from you guys, treating waitstaff poorly is a huge deal-breaker. Hell, treating anyone poorly is a deal-breaker. Guess I could change this one to "don't be an asshole". That'll do.
So there are your deal-breakers, folks. Did I miss any important ones?